Something happened this past weekend ... I joined a new church and this church was not in my plans at all. It was the church that I was first led to after my family left the last church my father pastored here in East TN. 6 years ago this church was a stopping point for me. A cornerstone to mark a foundation of healing that was to begin. After months of weeping in the balcony, the Lord moved me on to another church when I was finally ready to serve. I spent 5 wonderful years at this last church and planned to stay there for the rest of my life. However, the Lord started revealing a different plan at the end of March and it wasn't until August that I finally came to terms with it.
I had it all planned out as you might have read in previous posts. I knew how this was going to work. I'd visit small/medium to medium/large churches for a couple of months and then make a decision. I agreed to re-visit this church simply because I had friends there, they have a new pastor and I thought I'd go ahead and get it out of the way. The very first service I tended I thought "oh no! God, this was not my plan!" Something was different ... was it me ... was it them? I don't know ... I didn't care! It felt so right but it couldn't be this easy. It had to be so much harder than this ... right? So I sent some emails to the pastor and worship pastor (since I figured they would be the two that would have the most impact on me) and was ready to pounce on any answer that went against my convictions. Isn't that godly?! Good thing you would never do that! Their replies were horrible ... Spirit-led, encouraging and exactly what I needed to hear. The worship pastor wanted to meet with me.We ended up meeting two weeks in a row just to talk. He genuinely wanted to know how he could minister to me. I so appreciated that and at same didn't know quite how to receive it. He could see the in me the blessings and hurt from growing up in the ministry. Even though I have grown a great deal in the last 6 years I didn't realize that the hurt was still obvious on my face when I shared about my past and present experiences. One thing that the worship pastor said to me that I have really wrestled with is "God's grace is much bigger than you have experienced." I believe I have limited God's grace in my life ... as if my failures are unreachable by His grace ... as if there is a limit to His grace. I'm still coming to terms to with what that means in my life and asking the Lord to show more of Himself to me. I'm not sure what that will look like in my life but we'll see!
What I do know is that last Sunday for the first time in 20 years I joined a church without crying! All I felt was joy, relief and excitement over being there and gratefulness at the opportunity to join in on what God is doing through this church. As I have shared many times this year, my 2014 verse is Romans 8:28 "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according His purpose for them." The Lord has proven His faithfulness through this verse time and time again in the last 10 months. He has certainly worked situations for His good and glory in my life that I couldn't see how it would work out in the middle of the trial. And while it wasn't easy in the moment and I know I have more lessons to learn I'm thankful that He's still taking the time to work on me. I am blessed. This season I am trading sorrow for joy, tears for laughter and stress for relief. My cup overflows.
I love you all!
Blessings ...
- Melody Faith
PS: The photos were found on Pinterest!!
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